Tag: Decision making

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Making decisions. It’s something we all have to do. Some of us are better at it than others. 

I am not very good at making decisions, I actually find them rather stressful. My brain seems to ruminate and go over all of the different options again and again. I want to say yes to everything but also don’t want to say yes to anything because I never know what’s around the corner.

When I speak to Christian loved ones about it, their answers are often the same: Trust God and pray about it. Although this is a true statement, I don’t always find it the most helpful. I trust God completely, He’s taken me this far! But it doesn’t change the fact that I actually need to decide on an outcome and which path to take. 

So, as always, I thought I’d write about it. 

Decision making schools of thought

Everyone addresses decisions differently, some people like pros and cons lists, others follow their instincts, some people just procrastinate until the very final moment. 

UMass Dartmouth has put together a helpful, rather straight forward document on decision making. They suggest seven simple steps:

1. Identify the decision
2. Gather information
3. Identify alternatives
4. Weigh the evidence 
5. Choose among alternatives
6. Take action
7. Review you decision

This is great advice if you aren’t very emotions-based, or if the circumstances accommodate the decision being this straight forward. But for those that need a little more thought, Indeed has put together 12 more tender tips for making decisions: 

1. Try not to overthink
2. Take care of yourself 
3. Remove yourself from the situation 
4. Don’t shy away from your mistakes
5. Examine the opposite of your decision
6. Ask for feedback
7. Give yourself advice
8. Manage your emotions
9. Weigh short and long term consequences
10. Accept the possibility of making a poor decision 
11. Stay true to your values
12. Use data 

I think a balance between these two lists could be helpful. The first one is very practical, and the second one seems to fill in the gaps of the emotions flying around decision-making. However, I think there’s more to it…

Understanding the difficulty in my decision making

I think the key issue I have in decision making is control. Between having a rather chaotic childhood and now having hard some real hardships in adult life, I am fearful of the unknown because I want to always be prepared for what could come next.

Making a decision is stepping into an unknown and a new environment, which can make me feel anxious that I won’t be in control of a new circumstance if bad news were to arise. 

Another issue I have is that when I don’t know what’s coming next and have too much time on my hands, I seem to get more anxious about every day situations and stress over small things.

I’ve had a very intense couple of years and I know that I am in need of time off, but I seem to be spending my time off obsessing over what I should be doing next, rather than being in the moment and enjoying the gift of rest. 

Given the difficulty and stress that I faced last year, and then jumping into a very demanding job, it’s understandable to feel this way – but it doesn’t mean it is right. 

I think identifying the issues of why I’m struggling with decision making, offers me a good ground to understand what God may be trying to teach me in these circumstances. 

A bit of Biblical application

“And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to His purpose.” (Romans 8:28)

First of all, talking into the control that I struggle with, the verse above is a very helpful reminder. I need to remember that I can’t control everything that happens in life, but I can trust that God knows what will happen and that when I trust in Him, He works all things for my good. 

And He has done this again and again in my life so far! 

“Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for him.” (Psalm 37:7)

This verse reminds me to be still in knowing who God is and that He is the one in control. It is good to wait patiently on Him, trusting that He will guide me to where I need to be. 

A quote that I keep coming across on Instagram at the moment is, “Whilst you’re waiting for God to open your next door, praise Him in the hallway.” This may be a little cheesy, but perhaps it’s something I need to try to be better at. 

“He makes me lie down in green pastures, He leads me beside quiet waters, He refreshes my soul. He guides me along the right paths for His name’s sake.” (Psalm 23:2-3)

This little snippet actually reminds me of two truths:

1. The ‘quiet waters’ of rest that we are given refreshes my soul. I should enjoy the opportunity of rest that I’m in now. 
2. God will guide me ‘along the right paths’. I might not know how or when this will happen, but I can trust that it’s a promise that He makes. 

“Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they?” (Matthew 6:26) 

This verse is a beautiful reminder that God knows and cares for all of the animals on this earth, and He loves me even more than that. 

By trusting and following God, I have a relationship with the Creator that feeds the birds so I know that I do not need to worry about tomorrow because His grace is sufficient for this life, and the one that is to come! 

“As for me and my house, we will serve the Lord” (Joshua 24:15)

This verse is the anchor to all my decision making. I believe that my purpose in life is to try to be servant hearted to those around me, and imitate the way that Jesus lived whilst on this earth. When making a decision, the question I should always ask is, “Does this glorify God?”

In summary

Writing this has been helpful. The Bible passages highlighted seem to really point to being still and taking joy in this opportunity to refresh my soul. 

I’m so grateful to know God and to be able to relinquish the control that I seek to Him because trying to control and know everything only leads to more stress. 

Often when I’m making a decision, I do keep in mind that God rules overall, so I try to make a decision at a cross roads that will put me in line with His path for me. 

Although I recognise God’s supremacy, this way of thinking still tries to put a lot of control in my hands. 

A gentleman at church once said to me that we often do this but we have it all backwards. Really what God teaches is that we should make a wisdom-based decision but step out in faith, knowing that God is with us in whatever path we take. 

Our punitive decision making, isn’t going to effect God’s supremacy and overall plan. The decisions we make – whether they are right or wrong ones – are all part of His plan, and teach us more about Him along the way. 

How do you handle decision-making? Share your thoughts in the poll below!

“So whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God.” (1 Corinthians 10:31)